I don’t want to talk about it.
I don’t think I can talk about it at the moment.
Today, I’ve decided to take the role of curator rather than reviewer. It would be very easy for me to go on and on ranting about why Sarah J. Maas’ A Court of Thorns and Roses series is so brilliant…but none of it would be coherent whatsoever. Read my initial review of the first novel in the series, A Court of Thorns and Roses itself, and you’ll see why. I could barely form logical sentences upon finishing that one, and now, after spending another month immersed in the world of Prythian, journeying beside Feyre and Rhysand…well, I have nothing concise or legible to write. My brain is basically mush and has been since I finished the third novel in the series, A Court of Wings and Ruin, this afternoon in the Starbucks steps away from my home. Never mind that – my heart is mush. The story was touching on so many levels, the chapters towards the end were mind-blowing and heart wrenching, and I think what has me most emotional of all is the fact that it’s all over. I was lucky in that I picked up this series when all three novels were already completed and released, so that I could read them in rapid succession – I say that I was lucky because I didn’t have to wait months or even years before continuing on Feyre’s path with her, and yet, in some ways, I don’t feel lucky at all. I didn’t have to wait, but I also didn’t get to wait. Everything happened so fast, it was an utter whirlwind – I first entered Feyre’s world less than two months ago, and then I lived and breathed in it, got down in the trenches beside her, and now, after so short a time literally but so long and involved a time figuratively, my adventure has come to an end. And yes, I can reread the series endlessly for the rest of my life, but it will never be new for me again, and that is a sad and somewhat nauseating fact.
But, as I said, I don’t have anything productive to say about this series, nothing at all that hasn’t been said by other readers before me. So, instead, I am choosing to present to you some of the quotes I marked during my reading experience, those moments that truly touched me and that I will carry around with me for the rest of my reader’s life. These passages speak for themselves – no commentary is necessary – and it is my honour to present them to you as evidence of why the ACOTAR series is so one of a kind and enthralling. So much of what makes the series incredible is the way that Maas narrates through Feyre, the cadence and rhythm and actual poetry of Feyre’s inner musings and ruminations. It is so very easy to feel as though you are becoming a part of her consciousness, becoming her dear friend and confidante.
A note before all that though: I gushed and raved about A Court of Thorns and Roses the novel after finishing it, and I still think it is brilliant. However, A Court of Mist and Fury and A Court of Wings and Ruin have so much more to offer, the world grows so much larger and becomes more all encompassing, and I must admit that I fell in love with the series when I was in the midst of the second novel. I have to say it: I am Team Rhysand all the way, but not because I am comparing him to Tamlin or because I don’t believe in Feyre’s love for Tamlin and the connection they had. No, I am Team Rhysand, I am so enamoured with that High Lord of the Night Court, because he is Feyre’s true match, because he is her soul mate in every sense of the word, because he lifts her up, literally gives her wings and forces her to battle her demons, raise her voice, stand tall and become the defiant, strong and remarkably inspiring woman she is destined to be. I mentioned in my last blog post that being a man’s mate, for me, as a woman about to be married, means not succumbing to him, being submissive, subservient, quietly protected. For me, it means standing tall, being his protector as much as his protected. Choosing a mate, for me, means finding a man who will support me and who will stand in my corner as I fight my own battles. And Rhysand does just that for Feyre – he makes her his High Lady because he believes in her power, her ability to handle herself, and because he treats her as his true equal, as she rightfully deserves. What’s more, he helps her through her struggles with anxiety and depression, he urges her out of her shell and gives her the space and security to rebuild herself, stone by stone, until she is healed and whole again. As someone who suffers from anxiety and relies heavily on my own mate to navigate through it on a daily basis, I appreciated how gently but affectionately Rhysand helps Feyre through her traumatic experiences. This sort of relationship, of mutual trust and respect, is what we all need as an example in today’s society.
I offer to you, now, the passages in A Court of Mist and Fury and A Court of Wings and Ruin that utterly took my breath away…
A Court of Mist and Fury
*“‘You are no one’s subject….I will say this once–and only once…You can be a pawn, be someone’s reward, and spend the rest of your immortal life bowing and scraping and pretending you’re less than him…If you want to pick that road, then fine. A shame, but it’s your choice…But I know you – more than you realize, I think – and I don’t believe for one damn minute that you’re remotely fine with being a pretty trophy for someone…’”
*“Feminine, soft, pretty. I hadn’t felt like those things in a long, long while. Hadn’t wanted to.”
*“I tried not to flinch away from meeting his stare. ‘She’s mine…And if any of you lay a hand on her, you lose that hand. And then you lose your head…And once Feyre is done killing you…then I’ll grind your bones to dust.’”
*“If I hadn’t been already in love with him, I might have loved him for that – for not insisting I stay, even if it drove his instincts mad, for not locking me away in the aftermath of what had happened yesterday.
And I realized – I realized how badly I’d been treated before, if my standards had become so low. If the freedom I’d been granted felt like a privilege and not an inherent right.
Rhys’ eyes darkened, and I knew he read what I thought, felt. ‘You might be my mate,’ he said, ‘but you remain your own person. You decide your fate – your choices. Not me. You chose yesterday. You choose every day. Forever.’”
A Court of Wings and Ruin
*“I wasn’t sure I’d been born with the ability to forgive. Not for terrors inflicted on those I loved. For myself, I didn’t care – not nearly as much. But there was some fundamental pillar of steel in me that could not bend or break in this. Could not stomach the idea of letting these people get away with what they’d done.”
*“‘And you are High Lady of the Night Court.’
‘Indeed she is.’
My blood stopped at the voice that drawled from behind me.
At the scent that hit me, awoke me. My friends began smiling.
Rhysand leaned against the archway into the sitting room, arms crossed, wings nowhere to be seen, dressed in his usual immaculate black jacket and pants.
And as those violet eyes met mine, as that familiar half smile faded…
My face crumpled. A small, broken noise cracked from me.
Rhys was instantly moving, but my legs had already given out. The foyer carpet cushioned the impact as I sank to my knees.
I covered my face with my hands while the past month crashed into me.
Rhys knelt before me, knee to knee.”
*“It’s all right, Rhys soothed. This place cannot hold you.”
*“I do not let you do anything…You are your own person, you make your own choices. But we are mates – I am yours, and you are mine. We do not let each other do things, as if we dictate the movements of each other. But…I might have insisted I go with you. More for my own mental well-being, just to know you were safe.”
*“‘You do not fear…You do not falter. You do not yield….Remember that you are a wolf. And you cannot be caged.’”
*“I would have waited five hundred more years for you. A thousand years. And if this was all the time we were allowed to have…The wait was worth it.”
It speaks for itself, right?
A Court of Mist and Fury: ❥❥❥❥❥ (out of 5) ~ A new favourite!
A Court of Wings and Ruin: ❥❥❥❥❥ (out of 5) ~ A new favourite!
Girl with a Green Heart